Semi-NO!!!!!!

Amazing as Trebek. Iconic in Anchorman. Easily the best part of Zoolander. Should stop making movies. These are all phrases I use to describe Will Farrell. I'm already sick of teasers for his new movie Semi-Pro and with all of the products he's schilling, he's virtually omnipresent.

Will jumped the shark with the dinner prayer in Talladega Nights,

 and his cameo in Wedding Crashers is probably his last new role I will see until I have kids. I refused to see the passively homo-erotic fiasco with Nepolean Dynomite, and I will mercilously ridicule the decision of anyone I know to see Semi-Pro. Also, their opinion of what is funny will come to mean ZERO to me.

Why all of the Haterade, you ask? Well, if you asked me for directions to the nearest gas station and I provided them- would you repeatedly ask me the same question hoping for the same answer? But that's what Willdo does every time you ask him to entertain you because he plays the same guy every time!  He is always an overzealous, cold sounding, clueless, compensating asshole who yells at akward times. The only original movie Will Pickle stared in was Stranger Than Fiction.

I wish Chris Farley was still alive- his death was a tragedy and a clear reminder that fame hides flaws. Like Willer Bee, Farley was comedically brillant, lovable, oddly shaped, and very smart, but career-wise he was headed for this fate. Will Farrell should learn from those before him and find a new angle...and if he can stomach the Scientology recruitment pitch, maybe take some career advice from Travolta.

What Happens When You Listen

Great blog post about eTail and customer service @ the fantastic DMNews blog.

We all read blog posts and countless articles every day that preach principles like: 'Don't worry about your competition', 'Make customer service a priority', or the grand-daddy- 'Don't compete on price!' It makes a better point coming from a business that has applied these principles to grow their revenues almost 400 fold* in 6 years. Zappos.com- welcome to the place where money meets mouth.

Check it out.


Thanks to [Wooster Collective] and [Topher] for the image.
*Thanks to the comment for the correction

Absolut Bad Move

USA Today reports on the Sweedish Government's decision to put Absolut vodka (amongst other brands) on the auction block.

With an estimated price tag of $5.7 billion, potential buyers for V&S include market leader Diageo, Pernod Ricard and Fortune Brands, which already has a distribution deal with V&S.

"It's the best price that counts," Swedish Financial Markets Minister Mats Odell told The Associated Press.

Absolut is one of the most studied brands in the world, being highlighted in any university's marketing program across the U.S. not to mention (I'm sure) the rest of the world. It's the subject of books- from advertising to photography.

The most disappointing thing about this is that the buyer, whomever it is, will immediately put their own stamp on the brand, revamping their ads and calling it a "reenergizing the brand" or a "brand face lift". With the world's biggest brands willing to jump from campaign to campaign in search of immediate short term results to justify their spending, it has been fun to see one stick with their originality and creativity for so long. Even better, it's been one that's worked.

[via AdPulp]

Visa Declares War on Cash; Chase, Vowels

Visa decided to pick on something its own size, but I never thought I'd see the day when a company would take on such a large opponent, CASH MONEY. Visa's spot shows their vision of a cashless universe running like a well oiled money counter, until Mr. Square pulls out his billfold and opts to pay with printed legal tender.


On the same level, Chase has decided that vowels are a waste of time in helping to promote new ATMs. Actually, these are some of the better billboards I've seen lately. These get to the point quickly, illustrate an idea simply, are good support to their newest TV and print campaign about increasing ATM convenience.

They’re Not Crayons, They’re Entertainment Sticks

What do crayons and cats have in common? They both entertain kids, and Crayola has to compete with them along with 39,000,000 other things that keep kids busy. Think about it-Crayola isn’t in the crayon business, they’re in the children entertainment business- and it looks like they are getting sick of leaving money on the table.

A USA Today article chronicles the new massive undertaking of doubling Crayola’s business.

[Hallmark Cards, last month announced the name will be changed to Crayola on Jan. 1.

The name change is symbolic of an image revamp going on at one of the nation's best-known icons. Crayola is all done being a stodgy, buck-a-pack crayon company with tunnel vision and red-white-and-blue conservative values.

The company is working overtime this holiday to reinvent itself as a flashy maker of $20 gifts, from a "no-mess" spin-art machine to a mess-proof spray-painter that's emerging as one of its best-selling new products in decades. The company, which also owns the Silly Putty brand, is no longer a holiday advertising no-show, either. This year, it's tripling its holiday marketing budget, says Steven Ferry, a senior manager.]

At the outset it seems like Crayola is steering away from it’s Jim Collins-Hedgehog-type concept. But take a closer look. Maybe they’re just not focusing on the niche concept of crayons and markers, but viewing their core competence as entertaining children, where art is simply their medium.

[via MediaPost]

High School, Inc.

The Detroit Metrotimes reports of Compuware running a program called Hustle & TechKnow, a corporate educational academy aimed to educate Detroit high school dropout teens. The program completes their high school education as well as serving as a trade school for corporate life- teaching etiquette, computer skills, and how to function in the business world.

There are many topics in the article that merit discussion and praise. I think the marketing is exemplary because you can’t teach them anything until you get them in the door. Ever tried to convince a dropout to go back to school? It’s tough.

Miller met Principal Ida Byrd-Hill at the laundry while the financial-consultant-turned-educator recruited for the school. Byrd-Hill looked at gas stations, party stores and clubs for teens who had failed at several attempts at high school and needed one last chance at a diploma.

"We found them," Byrd-Hill says. "We passed out a flier that looked like a party invitation."

The school's brightly colored promotional material shows jets, cars and jewelry. "Learn corporate survival techniques," it boasts, "Trillions of dollars are exchanged daily." "Financial Success, built on knowledge" appears in a school crest. The message is not subtle: "Join the hustle," the flier says.

Like Flickr But Without The Photos

["Like Flickr, but without the photos. Wordie lets you make lists of words -- practical lists, words you love, words you hate, whatever -- and see who else has listed the same words."]

Good to see the internet isn't always used for porn and poker.











[via Coudal Partners] Wordie

Buckets Are Obsolete

Someday you should try looking at the world through rose colored glasses- or any type of classes different from your own. There is a revolution going on in society, and every marketer seems to think they have a plan to capitalize on it. Fact is, most plans are wrong; not in theory, but in scope.

Noelle Weaver’s post helped put into perspective a myriad of ideas I’ve had over the past five years.

Most companies start defining their target customers by putting them into buckets- male, 22, plays video games- you go here, 38 year old farmer in the Midwest- you go here. Too bad for them that people don't spend their time worrying about fitting into your buckets. What marketers need is a hose to fill their targets’ buckets with their information.

The problem is that marketers need to discard demographics and embrace needs. The question shouldn’t be how to reach the Midwestern farmer, but how to reach people who want to buy John Deer hats. Maybe that farmer buys his clothes online along with farm supplies and groceries, since it is easier than driving two hours to the nearest superstore. You just might also reach the college kids in Portland looking for mesh hats too.

Trying to put people in buckets just doesn’t work anymore because even though people follow trends for trendiness sake 3000% more than they will admit, more than ever they are now actively looking to go against trends. Remember the 10 trendsetting kids in your high school? Now everyone in high school is a trendsetter. Now, trying not to be trendy is trendsetting.

Don’t think so? You think Craig’s List wasn’t born out of aggravation of eBay culture online? You think American Apparel wasn’t conceived because someone was sick of the gaudiness of Tommy Jeans and blinging Sean Jean? Now they are staples of the marketplace.

Soccer moms are looking for less crowded gyms so they can fit in a quick workout during their baby’s afternoon nap. Bally’s doesn’t work for them- enter Curves. Maybe they weren’t looking for a place to workout amongst only women, but it was close to home and the removal men from the gym makes it easier to hit the free weights and get home.

People want the information you have to give, but they want it in a different way and from a different place than most marketers seem to want to give it. Why spend dollars to try to catch mice with your buckets? Wouldn’t it be easier to find a group of buckets and spray them with your message?

Websites are in the Eye of the Beholder

Running shoes, SUVs, cell phones, dog collars, vacations, the list of customizable products grows every hour. So why not the way you view websites?

Ever heard of Bookmarklets (or Favlets for you IE folk)? I’ve been hearing more and more about them lately, so I decided I should probably see what the deal was. Here’s what I found…

Want italic text or to view images at 300%?- no problem. If you want to view websites with black backgrounds and white text, you can do that too. You can even get a listing of all links or e-mail addresses on a site.
Bookmarklets are Javascript modifications that override URL code.

The concept was in mind during the invention of Javascript, and has been used since 2001, according to Wikipedia.

Greesemonkey allows Firefox to run live modifications or only for specified sites.

If you are looking on Amazon for a book, you can roll over the book title link and Bookburro will show you the prices of that book on other sites. It will even show you if that book is available at local libraries.

So what does this mean? Well, if you are a web designer it means that people will not always see your pages as you want them to. That custom color you worked so hard to get just right for the background- replaced by pink or white. It also allows users to find contact info quickly or blow up a tiny picture of your product.

All I’m saying is that you should keep these kinds of tools in mind when you are developing/recreating your web presence and find ways to make them beneficial. Why not even offer links to Bookmarklets on your site? (FYI- Bookmarklets don’t seem to work very well on Flash sites.)

God Loves a Good Website

One of the toughest things to do is get people to go to church. Ad Freak points us to Wonder Café, which is bringing a sense of style and open-mindedness usually devoid of the task. Go Canada!

The site has a discussion forum- that actually has level-headed posters-, a church search, and (for those of us looking for immediate gratification) the E-Z Answer Squirrel.

Check out their print ad campaign too (in the lower left corner of the homepage). The execution and copy are both great.

Be Nice, Get $1,000,000

This cold season, sitting next to this guy ====> might finally pay off. Here's the way it works: someone coughs, you offer them a Ricola lozenge, win $1,000,000! "Mystery Coughers" are being sent out into the wild, and the generous soul offering a lozenge will be instantly be able to select from 50 envelopes, one of which contains one million smackers (the rest have $1,000).

Go to the website to sign up to receive hints on where the Mystery Coughers will be. As an added bonus, a Mystery Cougher will be sent to someone's house in the town that has the most e-mail participants.

Sorry, Miami, Honolulu, and San Diego, my guess is that you are s.o.l. for this one.

Read more about last year's happenings.

Preview, and They Will Come

ESPN streaming radio might just be the best thing at work since the minimize button on Internet Explorer. Since there are some crazy laws regarding which commercials can run where and on which platform, there are many commercials that don't run on internet broadcasts.

To replace these, ESPN plays some background music and the same commercial for their Podcasting service. The problem is that they only have one commercial. I hear it 10 times everyday! It's not even a bad spot, just repetitive.

Wouldn't they be better served by introducing a podcast and the host, then playing an entire minute of the podcast instead of a minute of background music? My guess is that people using streaming internet radio fall into the target for their podcast service, or at least more likely aware of the podcasts. Why not hook the ones who haven't subscribed yet? Give them a taste of the service and I guarantee they would increase subscriber numbers.

It's Google's World, You Just Live Here

Forget Bill Gates and Wal-Mart- Google now looks as though they will take over the world- and they are putting a smile on our faces while they do it! Have you seen the web applications they are putting out? A quick look at Google’s Options shows almost 40 products, from customizable searches and shopping to text messaging and the omnipotent Google Earth.

Let’s take a look at the commerce giants they are challenging. Gmail (with unlimited storage and searchability functions) is fast becoming an e-mail favorite over Yahoo!, MSN/Hotmail. Google Docs & Spreadsheets allow users to create, edit, store, and share data online which will soon challenge (gasp!) Microsoft. Google is also moving onto more Gates territory with their Calendar- lookout Outlook! Not playing favorites, Google’s Homepage lets you collect RSS feeds (like The eCLECTIC other Apple Widget-like apps. The one opponent Google looks to have conceded to is YouTube- so they bought ‘em.

Take a look at Google’s beta testing playground- write some code, create a webpage, find a new subway route to work…hell, explore Mars- no seriously.

image from nerdyshirts.com